Sparky Goes Back Into Psychotherapy

Once again, as I have done in all of my developmental crises, I am back in therapy and it is a very comfortable place for me to be.

This particular developmental crisis was precipitated by the fact that I have a fatal diagnosis: it is called O.L.D. and there is no cure for it.

Being, at least on the surface, a reasonably coherent human being, I cast about me to find a therapist who would provide the guidance that I am seeking for this next chapter in my life. Of course, as is my custom, I sought out a potential therapist for whom I had strong positive feelings and, thanks to the largess of the Great Spirit, I found her. Her name is Heidi and she is soulful.

Heidi is a specialist in geriatrics and she is extremely knowledgeable in terms of practical, specific details in assisting me in scoping out this new territory. Of course, in addition to the technical knowledge, there is, at least on my part, a strong erotic connection between the two of us so, as a result, two thirds of the session is taken up with very important technical details and one third of the session is reserved for looking at the nature of the emotional connection between the two of us, otherwise known as “flirting.” Heidi seems to have no trouble at all in establishing comfortable boundaries and priorities.

In addition to her technical expertise in the area of geriatrics, Heidi also teaches sexuality to a group through her church. I checked this out very carefully and to my delight I found that, in spite of her a traditional background, she is an extremely avant garde thinker with respect to sexual issues. It took me no time at all to conclude that her ability to live with a traditional background and totally new ideas about sexuality were connected to her spirituality, and we talk about this topic all time.

An important part of our discussion centers on such topics as executors, living wills, designated powers of attorney and the like. My son, Davyd, has agreed to take on these burdens although I know it is not easy for him. I have invited him to attend my next session with Heidi and he readily agreed. I'm sure that our discussions will be helpful to us and I will probably post additional information about it in my blog.

Each time I leave a session with Heidi, I carry away a sentence of inestimable value to think about until the next week. In terms of my concern for Davyd, she said,” Being with someone who is dying is an honor and a gift.” The profundity of such wisdom will always be with me.

So begins my lessons in practical eschatology from Heidi whom I call, not my Gerontologist, but my

Thanatologist (but she does not disagree) and as a result of my efforts, and her teaching, I will be sadder and wiser in that order.